How should I live my life ? - Learn from people at the end of their lives to make sure you don't have regrets

Bronnie Ware , an Australian nurse who spent several years caring for patients during the last 12 weeks of their lives, routinely asked her patients if they had ' any regrets  or anything they wanted to do differently'.  She' wrote a book called ' The top 5 regrets of the Dying'. These were:

1. I wish I 'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
• The most common regret was that people didn't follow their dreams. They wished they had the courage to live the life they wanted not what was expected by society/family/peer groups. This led to a sense of loss at the end of life.
2. I wish I hadn't worked so much.
• Many people prioritised work over personal relationships and experiences, which led to feelings of guilt and loneliness.
3. I wish I had the courage to express my feelings.
• Many people suppress their emotions to avoid conflict and discomfort, resulting in unfulfiled relationships, unresolved issues and sometimes even health problems. 
4. I wish I had stayed in  touch with my friends.
• There is so much data saying how important it is to have good friends.  Many people lose touch with close friends due to getting caught up in life.
5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.
• Bronnie mentioned that most people realised at the end that happiness was a choice. Fear of change stopped them being silly or laughing properly. 

So what can we do to learn from these regrets?

1. Live true to yourself
• Identify your core values and passions
• Set personal goals that align with your authentic self
• Practice saying "no" to commitments that don't resonate with your true desires
• Regularly reflect on your life choices and adjust course if needed
2. Don't work too hard
• Establish clear boundaries between work and personal life
• Schedule regular time off for family, friends, and personal interests
• Reassess your career goals and work-life balance
• Consider flexible work arrangements or reduced hours if possible
3. Express your feelings
• Practice open communication with loved ones
• Keep a journal to explore and understand your emotions
• Seek therapy or counseling to improve emotional expression
• Have difficult but honest conversations when necessary
4. Stay in touch with friends
• Use technology to maintain connections (e.g., video calls, voice messages)
• Schedule regular check-ins with distant friends
• Send personalized notes or postcards to show you care
• Organize virtual or in-person gatherings with friend groups
5. Let yourself be happier
• Practice gratitude daily
• Engage in activities that bring you joy and fulfillment
• Challenge negative self-talk and limiting beliefs
• Prioritize self-care and mental health

Your time is limited. We can learn from people at the end of their lives, what is really important so make take at least one of these actions at start doing them.