The True Secret Of Success - You Are The Average Of Your Five Closest Friends

If you could do only one thing for success what would it be? There are many things that you can do from goal setting , to regular feedback, to visualisation but perhaps one of the most important, if not the most important of all is the people you hang around with.

Hubert  Howe Bancroft  spent his life studying  how and why people were successful and became rich. He summarised his work in his book 'The book of Wealth' (written in 1896). This was an inquiry into the  nature and distribution of the world's resources and riches. He found the one thing that showed if you would be successful was the company you keep.

The Elastic Band Effect

The reason for this is sometimes described as an elastic band effect.
If you are surrounded by negative people who are in a bad way , when you try and improve, they will act like an elastic band and 'snap' you back to their level.

If you are surrounded by positive, successful people, and you begin to be negative, they will 'snap' you back to  their level. This will be because of the sort of conversations they are having, the places they go, to topics they discuss, the businesses they work on, etc.

The Fastest Way to Success

The fastest way to change yourself is to hang out with people who are already the way you want to be......Reid Hoffman (founder of Linked In)

Reid Hoffman hit the nail on the head with his quote. If you are surrounded by people who have already got to where you want to be, they will be talking , doing, acting in a way to continue their success. If you are in that environment you will carried along with them.

Reasons for success

So  apart from the general flow what other advantages are there with the people you hang out with.

1. Support
• Your network gives you support. If you are in a positive, action oriented, goal focused environment, you will get positive suggestions and help.
2. Ideas
• You will have better quality ideas.
3. Resources and Connections
• They say your network = your net worth. A good network will give you good resources and connections.
4. Accountability
• A good network will hold you accountable and force you to succeed in the goals you have said and shared with them.

Actions

So what should you do?

1. Review the people you hang around

• One way is to give a red mark to everyone who is negative and  give a green mark to everyone who is positive.and make sure that you have more green marks then red marks ( and you remove as many of the red marks as possible)
• Another way is to score everyone. If they are energy neutral they have a score of zero. If they give you energy they are +1. If they give you a lot of energy they are +2. If they take your energy away they are -1 and if they take a lot of energy away they are -2 Then calculate your net score with the people you spend the most time with.

Whatever you find, you need to spend more time with positive people who have done what you  want to do already.

2.Start a Mastermind
There is  a Japanese proverb ' none of us is as smart as all of us'
Another thing to do is to start a mastermind. A group of people who meet regularly. Each person will talk about his problem and then everyone will give advice. The idea is that the mastermind (the sum of all the minds) is greater than the individual minds.

Remember - Whoever you surround yourself with determines your destiny. so choose wisely.

5 Body Language Tricks To Make Anyone Instantly Like You

Wouldn't it be  great if you could create instant rapport. Wouldn't it be great to make anyone instantly like you? Here are 5 body language tricks to do just that.




5 Body Language Tricks To Make Anyone Instantly Like You - Free English Lessons There's no question that body language is important, you can capture - and hold - anyone's attention without even saying a word. We've selected some of the best body language techniques and shared them through this lesson: The Flooding Smile "Don't flash an immediate smile when you greet someone," If you do, it appears as if anyone in your line of sight would receive that same smile. Instead, pause and look at the other person's face for a second, and then let a "big, warm, responsive smile flood over your face and overflow into your eyes." Even though the delay is less than a second, it will convince people your smile is sincere and personalized for them. According to Lowndes, a slower smile can add more richness and depth to how people perceive you. Sticky Eyes Pretend your eyes are glued to your conversation partner's with sticky warm taffy, Even after they've finished speaking, don't break eye contact. "When you must look away, do it ever so slowly, reluctantly, stretching the gooey taffy until the tiny string finally breaks." This technique will help you appear more intelligent and insightful. The Big-Baby Pivot People are very conscious of how you react to them. When you meet someone new, turn your body fully toward them and give them the same, undivided attention you would give a baby.Pivoting 100% towards the new person shouts, 'I think you are very, very special.'" Limit the Fidget If you want to appear credible, try not to move too much when your conversation really matters. "Do not fidget, twitch, wiggle, squirm, or scratch, Frequent hand motions near your face can give your listener the feeling that you're lying or anxious. Instead, simply fix a constant gaze on the listener and show them that you're fully concentrated on the matter at hand. Using your hands Use you hands to create appropriate gestures. Hand movements help you to get the words out of your mouth accelerating your thought process. Do not cross your hands while speaking, It passes a signal that your are disinterested in a conversation.

7 Ways to Make a Conversation With Anyone | Malavika Varadan | TEDxBITSP...

They say your network is your networth. Wouldn't it be great to have a bigger network.
“We mustn’t speak to strangers.” Malavika Varadan, challenges this societal norm, by presenting 7 ways to make conversation with anyone.