Have you heard of the 90 day challenge? It's a secret technique to happiness.
What do you need to start?
It's very simple , you just need
1 post it /sticky note pad
1 pen
1 minute per day
What do I have to do?
All you need to do is to write down daily, your heart's desire (e.g Relationships jobs, business,health, happiness, etc) on the post it note
Write by hand
Write as if the thing you wish exists already in the present
Not I wish or I could have but I have
Not negative , state in positive
For example:
I have a great relationship with my wife
I have more than enough to give to others
I am blessed
My finances are doing well
I have perfect health
I have a great relationship with my children
On the bottom right corner of the post it note, write a number.
Start with number 1 then next day number 2 then next day number 3 until you reach 90
However if skip one day go back to 1. so the 90 day challenge might take you 1/2 a year.
Wouldn't it be great if you could stay calm when you know you'll be stressed? Daniel Levitin talks about prospective hindsight (or pre-mortem) that the that the psychologist Gary Klein had written about.
He talks about thinking ahead and planning for future issues, such as:
1)To prevent losing things -Design a spot for things that move around. Eg have a hook for your keys or a box for your passport.
2)To prevent problems if you lose your documents on holiday --Take a cell phone picture of your credit cards, your driver's license, your passport then mail it to yourself . If they are lost you can then facilitate replacement
What other things can you think of? If you could spend 15 minutes now just think how much pain you can avoid later?
Do you want to live longer? Do you want to deal better with stress. Listen to this talk by Kelly McGonigal to find out how.
Stress. It makes your heart pound, your breathing quicken and your forehead sweat. But while stress has been made into a public health enemy, new research suggests that stress may only be bad for you if you believe that to be the case. Psychologist Kelly McGonigal urges us to see stress as a positive, and introduces us to an unsung mechanism for stress reduction: reaching out to others.
So what should you do to live longer and be able to deal with stress. You should do the following 3 things.
1.Rethink your view to stress from being bad to something good that is making your body energised and ready for action. Stress actually has some benefits as it releases oxytocin which:
i)Makes you more social.
ii)It is anti-inflammatory
iii)It repairs your heart
2.Care for others
3. Go after meaning in your life.
Rethink you view of Stress
Your belief changes your world and now has been shown to save your life.
An 8 year study of 30,000 people showed that people who did not view stress as harmful had the lowest risk of dying.
Another study analysing people under a stressful situation (the social stress test) would have blood vessels constricting normally but they wouldn't constrict if they viewed stress as a sign that their body was energized and preparing to meet a challenge. So you should think of the stress response as helpful, as it is preparing you for action.
Makes you social
Oxytocin is a neuro hormone. People don't realise it is a stress hormone pumped out by pituitary gland. It has been called the cuddle hormone. It makes you crave contact, seek support, increase empathy and make you help people.
Anti-inflammatory
Oxytocin is anti -inflammatory
Strengthens you heart
Oxytocin helps heart cells regenerate and heal form any stress induced damage
Caring for others
A study of 1000 adults with ages ranging form 34 to 93 showed that people who spent time caring for others showed absolutely no stress related increase in dying. Caring created resilience
Go after meaning
Go after meaning is more important than avoiding discomfort.
If you are suffering stress, panic attacks, unwanted emotions and thoughts, then the 54321 Grounding Technique might help.
The ancients used to say ' the mind is a kite and the breath is a string' when your mind is running away, in a state of panic you forget that you can control it with your breath. Just breath in slowly for a few seconds, hold for a few seconds and breathe out for a few seconds. This put the brakes on your racing mind. Then go through the 5,4,3,2,1 technique -see below.
When you are doing this make sure you give your full attention to this. Again it will act as a brake. Grounding is just bringing to focus on the now. Your brain can only focus on one thing at a time so if you are fully focused on the now you cannot be in a state of panic about a future or past event.
5. SEE FIVE things around you.. This could be your computer (in your office), a window (at home), a lampost (in the street), a seat (in the tube) or a flower (in the park). Doesn't matter what it is, just find and look at five different things.
4.TOUCH FOUR around you. This could be the carpet or the clothes you are wearing or a pen you have or a book or wall near you. Ideally touch them and feel the sensation against your skin.
3 HEAR THREE things around you. It could be a dog barking or the sound of the air conditioner or someone talking. Just listen and notice three separate things.
2 SMELL TWO things around you. This could be bread or the smell of perfume or the smell of your skin or anything around you.
1 TASTE ONE thing. What can you taste on your tongue, or something in your mouth or the taste of something you had to eat recently.
So practice this technique and the next time you feel anxious try it and see how it helps.
Love this video - Who needs a psychologist when you have Bob Newhart! This is very funny but has a serious point. It's an example of a pattern interrupt.
